Soul Mates

What are soul mates? How do you recognize it when you meet? Do you have problems with them in life or does life go smoothly once you find your soul mate? Should your soul mate need to look elsewhere for gratification of any sort?
These are questions I have for everyone, to see how you see them.
Personally, I see Soul Mates as being a part of each other that goes through the life cycles and hopefully finds each other again time after time. I feel that when you meet your soul mate you will recognize that other part of you that has been missing, and that your soul mate should also recognize you. It may be instantaneous, or it may take a while of getting to know each other to realize who each other is.
Just as with any other relationship, I feel that the road ahead of you may not be smooth as glass, but may have bumps and turns along the way. Disagreements along the way should be expected and may be healthy for them as well. It would be nice to think everything would be euphoric, and for some this may be.
However, I dont believe that Soul Mates would deliberately do anything to harm the other, mentally or physically. I think they would be considerate of each others feelings and would think before doing something that may cause pain to the other one as a result of their action.I believe that they would not need to look outside their union for any kind of gratification. Sure, they may look at other people and find them attractive, but need to see others naked or engaged in sexual activities just because the they are not getting what they want at the moment? No, I dont think this is something a Soul Mate would do. If presented with pictures of others, could they look and appreciate the pictures? Sure. Nothing to be ashamed of in the naked body and sex. But purposely seeking it out, no.
So tell me how you view Soul Mates so I can see if perhaps my expectations are too high or on course or what ever.
Thanks to all and Brightest Blessings.

Tags: mates, relationships, soul, souls, unions

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by harleylilithnoir on February 27, 2008 at 8:34pm: Pretty much sums it up.
I met a guy 5 years back who I thought whole-heartedly was my soul mate. He wasn't.
Then 2 years ago met another guy who I thought whole-heartedly was. He disappeared into the night, so guess he wasn't either.
I have been wrong twice but that does not mean I don't still hold that idea up in my heart, mind and soul. Good to know that I am not alone in my thinking.
Blessings; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by peace lily on February 27, 2008 at 8:46pm: I honestly don't believe in soul mates. It sounds REALLY romantic to say that you found someone who "completes you", as in being the other half of you. But in reality, I believe you have to be complete IN YOURSELF, by yourself and that to LOVE someonee means to CHOOSE to be with them, not HAVE to be with them. I think lots of people miss out on beautiful, loving, fulfilling relationships because they are looking for their "soul mate", when such a thing really doesn't exist.

I could be wrong, but that is my opinion... :)

Much Love and Light,
Peace Lily; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by harleylilithnoir on February 27, 2008 at 10:12pm: I think the best answer is actually in her original question " How do you recognize it when you meet?"
Now wither you look at them as a soul mate or just a life mate is up to you.
I am looking for my soul mate, but that is part of my personal belief system. Obviously I have been unable to recognize the guy so far cause I have been hurt.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sheila on February 27, 2008 at 10:24pm: In my opinion a sole mate is someone who you go through lifetimes with, more than one. They can be one of the opposite sex or one of the same sex. Sexually attracted to each other and have the intimate relationship with, or a deep bonded friendship that withstands the strains of time and all the things that life has to offer. This lifetime they may be the person you are married to, other times they may be a dear friend, and yet other lifetimes you may spend looking and searching for that person and never find where they are, and yet have a yearning for them.

My soul mate this lifetime happens to be a dear friend of mine. We use to live close to each other, and then we she ended up moving a ways away so that she could be close to her family during their time of need, and has lived there now for several years. We are connected in a way that is hard to describe. We understand and accept each other. Both of us are female and neither one attracted to each other in a sexual way. We have so close a relationship, and can tell when the other has a need or a hurt. When really great things happen to each other that is also somehow shared. We talk to each other only about once a week as she does not have internet at this time.

Sometimes people are so intent on finding their soul mate that they are meant to share their lives with that they overlook them because they are not who they expect them to be. They are looking for a lover or someone to be intimate relationship with, someone who they are physically attracted to. That does not always happen.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by peace lily on February 27, 2008 at 11:01pm: I guess I am just getting practical in my old age, LOL ;)

I must say, however, that Sheila makes a very interesting point. WHAT IF your "soul mate" is your best friend, or a child or a much older person or someone who hold NO physical attraction for you or is gay and you are straight or visa versa? Hmmm, interesting.....

For me, the idea of "soul mates" poses too many problems, (like the one Sheila brought up.). Plus, it's just WAY too much work to figure out! Is this guy my SM? Is it that guy? So, I don't date either of them because I don't know?? Love should be easy, not a search. Again, just my opinion

Peace Lily (who is in love with my husband and not giving a fig whether or not he is my "soul mate".); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by harleylilithnoir on February 27, 2008 at 11:04pm: My friend's soul mate was a gay man. It worked for them for 7 years then it just got too much because she became sexually attracted to him. I wish I could be lucky enough to have that feeling of security with someone. Lover/friend or other wise.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by NCWyldewytch on February 27, 2008 at 11:02pm: I agree with you whole heartedly on this as well. I have a bestestestestest friend this lifetime that I swear we have been married in another lifetime. I had thought of her as my soul sister, adnm thus brings me to another question, can you have a soul mate and a soul sister/brother/etc as well?
If I accept that she is my soul mate this life time, then finding the lover aspect will be just that, and that is something as well.
Both she and I have been "looking" for our soul mate...but perhaps it is really us who are the mates...I dont know. I would have said most undoubtedly yes a while ago, until a major rift occurred in our threads.
So another question then, is, can or would soul mates hurt each other, either meaningly or accidentally?
sigh...so many ways this can go eh?
Thanks for your thoughts on this.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sheila on February 27, 2008 at 11:13pm: No matter how close two souls are we are still human, and we say and do things that hurt even those that we love the most. The test of soul mates is being able to work through the hard times and still be able to be there for the other.

Can a person have more than one soul mate? Maybe, I don't know. Love can be deep and strong even if you are not soul mates. Maybe there can be more than one. Sometimes it is hard to tell who is your soul mate. Sometimes it may be that you have experienced such deep meaningful things with another that you are as close as soul mates. I don't know.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sheila on February 27, 2008 at 10:56pm: Sometimes soul mates are not intended to be married to each other. like I said above, sometimes they are just good friends, sometimes then never find each other in the lifetime that they are living. I hope all works out for the best for you. I know this must be a hard and trying time for you.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sheila on February 27, 2008 at 11:07pm: If you ever need someone to talk to I am here, and I understand.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sheila on February 27, 2008 at 11:16pm: then they were not true friends. The offer will stand, if you ever do need someone.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by NCWyldewytch on February 27, 2008 at 11:04pm: Im sorry to hear that Kenneth. But I ask, how do you know she is your soul mate? How can a soul mate cause this kind of turmoil? That is one of my delimmas I face. I hope it works out for you and you can find peace in this lifetime.; ▶ Reply to This