The saying 'boys will be boys' sure seems to allow boys to think they can get away with anything. That and the young offenders act protecting them....
I remember how guys objectified the girls and made sure they knew of any imperfections (of course it was to 'help them' realize the flaw and correct it *pah*) And how they would try to get in girls pants (lying cheating and trying every trick but genuine honesty....then condemning the female for falling for the lines/moves)
Here is a link to an article about 'being a teen girl' (I added it to the thread about the womans body being a public place, but I thought this could use some attention of its own)
How did society come to allow boys to act in these manners? I know it was unheard of in my grandparents days, for boys to be so disrespectful to others. (Male or female...)
What can be done to correct the behavior? (educate, sure....but how?)
Care to share an experience and the result of it? (Or something that could have/should have been done differently for a more positive outcome?)
How did society come to allow boys to act in these manners? I know it was unheard of in my grandparents days, for boys to be so disrespectful to others.
I think you and your Grandparents have a romanticized version and remembrance of that time.
My grandmother ran a boarding house for young women.My Dad and Uncle used to tell me stories about how they had their pick of any of the girls there.
This stuff isn't new.
Romantasized, sure I'll take that... (but I cant say I remember any of it....I wasnt alive yet lol)
But can you agree that it is seemingly more 'socially accepted'? Why do you think that is?
I know its not new, but it has been getting worse over the years (especially with the young offenders act protecting their indescretions)
Your uncles had their pick..... but those were willing girls....not all these girls are as willing (as to be some guys pick)
Women can be just as predatory as men. Women and men should be taught certain things, like how people use sex to get what they want.
I find many of this whiny though. Most of the time these women whine about being victims and do absolutely nothing about it. Why they never learned that they have power, including to say no amazes me. Nor do I understand why any woman would be with a man who does not respect her. When I was a child a stripper taught me that I should never sleep with a man who does not respect me. Best advice I ever followed. While I am single now, I am also independent and not tied down.
many are not enlightened with good advice like that (which is very unfortunate)
Some women will say no (at first) And the guy that does not accept that, continually tries to plead his case, making the girl feel obligated. I had a guy try to guilt me into more, by claiming 'blueballs'...(just as an example)
Women need to stand up for themselves. It's a part of the growing up process.
Ms.Pouncer, I may have misunderstood your post.
If we are talking guys are dogs and try to get girls into bed then yes that's been around forever.If we are talking forced sexual acts then that's a different matter.
I was one of those guys that tried everything to get laid.But no meant no.Simple as that.I think there's a lot of pressure peer and otherwise on both male and females.Virginity is seen as an outmoded concept.We as Americans are very confused when it comes to sexuality.One one hand we're bombarded with images at every angle but yet it's seen as something that is difficult to talk about or hidden away.
I've come to see the double-standard of guys are supposed to have a lot of sex but girls who do are labeled as sluts and whores as wholly unacceptable.Now we have this is it slut shaming?When does it stop?I'm not going to go into the feminist side but let's just say maybe these guy should be lined up and kicked repeatedly in the junk or forcibly subjected to the same actions they preformed.If they want to act like adults lets treat them as such.
One one hand we're bombarded with images at every angle but yet it's seen as something that is difficult to talk about or hidden away.
Maybe a change in the way the media portrays people and exploits images? Maybe choosing better role models for little girls to look up to (boys too for that matter)?
Maybe choosing better role models for little girls to look up to (boys too for that matter)?
There are some things I love about the USA, and some I hate. One of the obsessions I really dislike is a (in comparison) incredibly high interest in jailbait girlies, and this interest comes from the adult population, NOT from the kids even. It is tied to "Evil is who sees evil" trope.
We don't have a culture of tarting up minor females *to that extent*, like it even happens in Disney club (even thought tame, I see it brings forth barely/non legal bombshells as if it were a factory), here there is a little more "following through" with the sexiness level of the individual.
good advice like that
The problem is that the advice itself is nothing. You need to have the peer who LIVES IT around you, to observe them and let their "power" rub off on you.
I said "no" many times and that did make my teen life hell, because, wound male pride and all that, they later went and tried to spread the most colourful rumours.
Which is an ongoing pattern for me, with being put in a catch 22 by males. If you say yes, you'll be used and disrespected, if you say no, you find yourself confronted with wild tales of what a slut you are, and disrespected.
Life remains like High School.
So what I did, unfortunately was to re-act, I started to consciously not adhering to the mainstream code of "sexy appearance" or even "comely, for a male", not being unnecessarily friendly to males, particularly alphas, who can take a beating.
Many even like being treated in an abrasive and rejecting manner. Friendliness apparently lowers their opinion so far that you are not a respectable person any more.
I was working in electronics 3 years back, and went through thousands of mobile phones to repair and format them. It told me a lot about minors and it mostly taught me that males apparently used to be less reactionary than they are now, referring to the late 80tikes to the last third of the 90ties. While boys try to keep many girls on the hook at the same time and sleep around, girls, even the "top ranked of the harem" are quickly called worthless whores, if something goes a way boys do not like. Girls are usually completely oblivious about that boys do on the side.
wasnt it the start of the era (end of 90s) that guys started claiming "dont want to be treated like a slut; dont dress like one"? There was even cops that supported this sentiment...
15-yr old male, charged in a string of sexual assaults!