There are many faces of the Goddess. Yet, here we are as humans, often following the belief that we are "part" of Deity, or perhaps representatives of Deity.
In that light, I'm wondering what you think/feel on a particular subject; a pagan man, Goddess-worshiper, who refuses to make love with his wife except on his own schedule, in his own way, regardless her pleasure, and when confronted with her tears over this responds by telling her he finds her overweight to be a turn-off. Factor in that he met, fell in love and married her at her current weight.
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I don't fully agree Lass. Marriage is about give and take. Now, I do agree that she should WANT to lose the weight. Like I said, if everything else in the marriage is fine the wife has to be willing to do this for her husband, but for herself as well. Lets face it, if she is over weight it could be bad for her health. Losing it would be good for her and it might help her husband find her more sexually appealing. I don't yell at Tom when he says he isn't turned on by the clothes I wear, or how I did my make up, or even how I smell. I FIX it. And while these are simpler things, I think it still applies to the weight. She can fix her weight and if she is willing to for her husband than good for her and him! He doesn't have to be attracted to her. Maybe he married her because he loves her but he just can't deal with the sexual side of it any more? The op also has yet to say she is demanding her to change or that he is even really being an asshole about it. Maybe he was just admitting that there is an issue with their marriage on his end of it? Your friend was given an ultimatum. That's kinda messed up. OP said nothing about such thing.
One thing which may not be the popular opinion but at least he's being honest with how he feels. I don't think there's any easy way to tell someone they aren't sexually or physically attracted to them anymore. As we age, we change and our bodies change, it's just part of life. I'll be 43 this year (UGH! lol) and I try to maintain and take care of myself as much as possible, I do this for myself because when I fall outside of my normal range then I feel like crap; mentally, spiritually and physically :) And I would be lying if I said I didn't take into consideration my boyfriend that I live with because I do indeed want to be attractive for him as well as for myself.
I'm not sure where the Goddess fits into this because it appears the OP is discussing her situation, not a Goddess in the aspect of deity worship (but I could be wrong).
While some may not agree I find that his honesty is not necessarily bad, it's a starting point to working through it. It's when one doesn't communicate that big problems can arise. I think rather than being upset by it, to look at it from the point of where do we go from here and how do we resolve it.
The "give and take" works well for David and me XOC......he gives in alot because he is the easiest going gent in the land..but then I dont ask him to comprimise on much,because the true KEY is accepting your mate for who they are,all the nutty things,eccentric stuff and enjoying it......You'll know if you connect with that person.......
I agree and oftentimes I end up taking more than I give. What can I say I'm an emotional black hole. That being said if Nick asked me to lose weight, I would do my best to do so. Lucky for me he doesn't.
I understand XOC and I wouldnt be with a man as such to begin with. But I will tell you,I've worked with larger gents and they are in my aerobics class because of the wives nagging at them and withholding sex,so it works on BOTH sides,but i agree with you. In my wildest,I couldnt imagine DAVID telling me anything in relation to how I look,clothes I wear,my hair......like I said he "gets it" now,obvioisly I'm, a cagey olde Witch. I wouldnt wear my leather mini skirt to a formal USAF dinner,but if I did.....he really would not have said a thing,fortunately i have common sense,some places are not approproate for 14 inch minis or 16 or whatever
Having a "diet" partner may help...............if she chooses too and/or insecurity,as yiu said Son of L
Just to be sure I've said it, I wanted to lose some weight even when we were first together, and he'd assured me we would be playing, jogging, weight lifting, and he would teach me a sport or other. He reneged on those promises, but did do those things alone and with other people. I've asked many times to go swimming or play ball...usually he forgets or makes other things a priority.
EXCELLENTT and YOUR husband was/is indeed a Knight,as I see it too......JESSICA!! to be helpful,supportive and standing by you,encouraging ones change of body image is a fine thing,but to ridicule them,threaten them or demand,especially in gaining or losing weight,simply does not work. SAY you lose the weight and he is happy to have sex with you again,wont you harbor the resentment that he "MADE" you lose weight? Honesty is good,communication is great between partners,holding an ax over their head of what ifs,isnt,I believe......and what happens if you regain the weight?
The current image of a woman is flawed.. I believe everyone should take care of themselves but that doesnt mean be a tooth pick. My wife has never been small but I love everything about her. She has even gained some weight over the years but I still find her sexually attractive. Ok, I just wanted to share my opinon!