Now, I do not have any kids of my own and frankly my current partner doesn't want anything to do with children and sometimes I wonder how I would even fair as a parent. I think I've got some growing to do before considering children(Even though I already have names for children picked out, haha). But for any of you who have children I was wondering, do you raise them to be Pagan? Or do you raise them and let them make their own choices? My partner says he would never want to "groom a child to believe one certain thing" which I can understand. I would want my child to make their own choices. But I also would think it would be kind of fun having children who believed the same things you do, so I might want to instill some Pagan traditions in their upbringing....I really don't know though.....How have you raised your children? If you don't have children, how would you raise them? Do you have names picked out for your future children? And do the names have any special meaning?
I don't have any children, names picked out - just for a boy, found it in a book and fell in love with it. However I'm posting on this today just to let you know you have no future with children if you stay with your current partner. They aren't going to change over time to want children. If you really think and plan on having children one day you may just be making it harder on yourself staying with who you are with right now. I do plan on having my children (if i have any) raised in a pagan path and to be tolerant and curious of other religions. Children are not really able to make a choice until they can form coherent thoughts bound by logic versus emotion - which comes later on in the single digits (at least in my own opinion i'm not going to have anyone hold me to that lol) however i think that your best bet is to at least find someone who shares the same type of want in the future as you.
Well, I don't believe I can have children anyway, and I cannot afford to adopt, so its pretty much just a dream at this point. I think he could change his mind, he would actually make a good father, my dad didn't want kids for a long time....He changed his mind, my step mom hated kids and now she has my little brother and loves him. A lot of the doctors and fellow technicians I work with did not want or plan to have kids, and have them, and love them. People can change their mind. But, because of medical issues, I don't believe I can have children, so it might not matter anyhow.
I follow the Native American spirituality I was raised with. My kids were raised in my home, so there fore they were exposed to my spirituality. I never insisted that they be a part of my spirituality, and they adopted a lot of my culture. But as grown ups I have two neo-wiccan, a semi-christian, and one that is still undecided, but seems to be leaning more toward the Native way but maybe a christian twist to it, also another undecided, but she is still in her teens and I don't see her settling into any kind of spirituality until her late twenties to early thirties like her siblings.
They all believe in witchcraft, but only three of them are practicing witches. Your children will be who they are in all forms of their lives, all you can do is guide them on a moral path that you find acceptable and define their personalities so they are enjoyable for at least a few people to be around. I guarantee they will do what they feel is right when they are grown whether you agree with it or not.
Well, we agree on most things for the most part. He has a young niece and nephew and I have a little brother and he handles them pretty well when he is around them. He is just not a fan of loud noises, and well, kids make loud noise a lot of the time(He isn't a fan of dogs either for this same reason)....But I think he is right about the "grooming" a child to believe one certain thing, he thinks they should have a choice. He is Agnostic and I'm obviously not. My mother thinks he'll change his mind, I think he would enjoy having a child he could play video games with, though I have told him I would want our kids to go outside too sometimes.....I have the name Calista Jaqueline picked out for my first daughter, he is that fond of it, but he says I can name our child that if it pleases me.
I don't raise my children in any real sort of "belief". Yes, they attend catholic school, but that's only because I find they have a better education system than the public (my husband and sisters are products of public systems and can't read worth crap...they were just pushed through the system with no help at all, and I don't want that for my children...besides the public school around here doesn't have any stance against bullying; my neighbors son had to learn to fight to defend himself, and I'm not exposing my children to that BS)
Anyways, I digressed there a bit. We did try the going to church thing, because my husband is catholic, but there is very little interest (for me) in going, and it's about a 20-25 minute drive to the church, so we don't go anymore (the price of gas doesn't help either).
My children (unlike my neighbors children) understand that the earth and the universe are created through systematic changes caused by cause and effect (but not so technically lol). Whereas my neighbors children believe the sky is blue "because God wanted it that way", my son (who is smart as a whip) understands the science behind it, and if you ask him why the sky is blue, he'll go into a long lecture of what happens to make the sky blue...my daughter, on the other hand, could care less...if you ask her why the sky is blue, she'll just say because it's blue lol.
My son shows a passing interest in my beliefs now and then, however he asks me about it at the most inopportune moments, and it makes it difficult for me to elaborate, especially in mixed company (my sister-in-law now lives with us, and she's almost the type to believe it's wrong to believe in other "Gods" (being catholic and all), but she's not "in-your-face" about it). I've included my daughter in some of my rituals, but she doesn't understand the reason behind it, and really just goes through the motions "mom is doing". It would be nice if she could understand why I do the things I do, but she's only 5, and more interested in playing with the rubber duckies that are beside me, than why I do Witchcraft.
It's difficult to really raise your children one way, when they're so exposed to another on a constant basis (i.e. their school). My children will know whatever they learn, and will probably end up finding their own way in the end (like me...as I too attended Catholic school, and found my own way after I got out of school). I don't worry about "Christian" exposure, and their possibility of becoming "scary fundamentalist" or anything like that. We're pretty laxed here about beliefs, and any "bible thumping" family members are a 5 hour drive away.
(Holy crap, that was way longer than I expected lmao)
I don't have kids but if I did, I would allow them to participate in all my child appropriate activities. If for no other reason than research shows that parents and children bond better when they spend more time together. Same reason I take my dogs every where I go. It instills loyalty in them. So yes, I would take my kids to pagan events. When they got old enough to begin the critical think process and decided it was not for them, I would understand and let them walk their own path if they choose to do so.
I have a two year old girl and both my husband and I are pagan. We're going to raise our daughter Pagan. I believe there's a big difference between indoctrination and sharing ones faith. Pretty much every other religion, spiritual group, or non religious group share their beliefs and practices with their children without shame. So I don't really understand why the idea of sharing one's spirituality with one's own children is such an issue in Paganism. I really do believe one can teach a child about one's faith without having to scare or guilt the hell out of them. I think a Pagan can teach their child Paganism and at the same let the child know there are other religions out there and if he or she wants to look into something else that's okay. I really don't think the only choices are strict close-minded unmoving indoctrination or cutting a child completely out of the parents' spirituality. Both of these are kinda cruel in my opinion.
Then there's the fact that no matter how you raise your child, the child is going to make their own choice when it comes to Spirituality. This is going to happen with or without spiritual instruction. With instruction they make the choice to continue with the faith they were raised in, or to look into other religions. I was raised as a Christian my whole childhood, and I'm pagan now. I have a friend who raised Pagan who's now a Jew. I have faith if paganism isn't the right religion for her, she'll be able to make the choice when she's older. Whether she chooses Paganism or not, she'll have my blessing.