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Hi everyone,

I've been having some trouble with my Schizophrenia recently. I don't think my meds are working, I still hear voices. I've worked it out, I think there are three voices. One I hear outside my head, as if it is real, like it's being heard by my ears. I've only heard this one twice since August. The other one is not outside my head, but it's still real, I hear this one every couple of weeks. The last (and most frightening) is the third one, which appears to be around most of te time. The problem with this one is that I think I've had it since I was about 13 or 14, and I'm so used to it I don't notice it, until I realise I'm talking to it and it's talkign back to me, it's very sneaky though, it's as if it pretends to be my thoughts, but I know it cant be.
Also, I've just got my first boyfriend five weeks ago, and the voices really don't like him. I think he's lovely, but they keep saying he's horrible and ugly, it really distresses me, and it's getting in the way of our relationship, but he doesn't know that. He knows I'm schizophrenic, but how do I tell him that something which isn't me (but is kind of 'a part of me') really hates him? I think they doin't like him because it's not just me and them anymore.
The other part of my problem is hospitalization. A lot of the time I just feel like going to the hospital and begging them to take me in, help me, I can't cope with this anymore, it's destroying me, I'm onlly 19, I shouldn't be so messed up like this. I mentioned to my Mum that I don't want to take my meds anymore because I can't think straight on them, everything is so cloudy and fuzzy, and she said "If you stop taking your meds you will end up in hospital" and then I replied that I wouldn't mind that if it meant i would get better, and she then told me that I would actually get better medical treatment in hospital, but then I had to go and we havent spoke about ti since.

Does anyone have any help on any of this? Please...

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Replies to This Discussion

Well it sounds like you already know what to do. You realize you need help to control your voices and you know where to go. Now you just need to get yourself there. Sounds like you have a pretty good head on your shoulders....no go ask for help. Best wishes hon
My first attempt to answer was eaten by a browser crash.

If you need to go to a hospital, go to a hospital.

But.. When I have a headache, I take something for it. if the problem is entirely physical, the headache goes away. If I've got, say, an energy problem, then it doesn't, and I know that I need to get one of my energy-manipulating friends to help me fix it.

If a drug or an herb makes the voices tolerable (or disappear) without making everything in the world seem worse, then take it. And don't stop because it 'got better.' I made that mistake with the St Johns Wort that controlls my depression. It was a bad move. On the other hand, if someone wanting to teach you to control a Gift pops up, and they aren't going to try to interfere with you otherwise, take them up on it. If it takes both to get you going and keep you going, Well, you have a body and a soul, and you have to take care of both of them.

I hope you get what you need to get to where you're going.

Disclaimer: My mh issues are depression and anxiety.

Hi:  Are you feeling better now?  I know this is an old post, but am concerned, as I know what it feels like!  Icemaiden

Hi Icemaiden, thanks for your concern, a few months after I posted this I did end up in the psych ward, things are better, but still not perfect (but what is perfect really??)

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