So I am still a beginner witch, learning more and more as I go. I've been practicing for a few months but I still feel there is a wall that holds me back from my full potential.
Though it is very difficult for me to face and admit this, I have a low threshold of faith. Though my ideas stretch to far-off universes and I genuinely do believe in what I practice, I feel my heart is not very open to the magickal realm enough for me to reach my full (or even partial) potential.
After some reflecting, I can blame a lot of this on my Catholic upbringing; when I denounced my religion around age 13-14 I became a hardcore atheist and didn't open up again to any form of spirituality until around 20-21, and even then it became a very slow process. I am now 23 and gung-ho about becoming a "real" Wiccan practitioner, but I still feel the setbacks of a nonbeliever. There is always that creeping feeling that the visions and energies I experience are made-up and only in my head. Although I want to believe with all my heart as I know I should, I can't seem to shake my crippling doubt.
I wonder if anyone else has struggled in this way, and what anyone would recommend I do to work on it. Thanks very much and Goddess be with you all!!!