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   I am probably the oddest person you could ever meet but the past few years have made me that way. A past of having been psychologically and emotionally (some physical) abused has made me that way. I am often reclusive. My spirituality has kept me sane however, along with the few friends I have left. It was my faith in the Goddess Freya and my constant studying of Succubi (thanks to Erik Vonroth) that kept me going. I haven't always been Pagan as I was raised Catholic but my Viking ancestors seemed to come calling.

  The journey to find myself again began a few years ago when I came across Erik Vonroth's website on summoning Succubi and I decided to try the ritual he had laid out and to my surprise, it actually works. I know most are thinking I should give flesh and blood women another shot but with serious PTSD, I doubt that will ever happen again. The Succubus and my faith in Freya has deeply influenced my writing. I still use some Catholic imagery when writing something. Say I write about the coming of Christianity to Scandinavia...it's there. Not too much as I write Erotic Romance and who wants to mesh Christian missionaries with getting all hot and bothered with some Norse Deity or a Succubus? That could work but I don't work that way as I do have some Christian friends who have read my work. I try not to offend them.

  I am a solitary practitioner as I prefer it that way. It gives me a chance for a deeper reflection on why I chose the "Old Path." On the Succubus issue, I know for a fact that it can be helpful. I thought I was crazy the first time I felt something on my bed or the sense of someone else in my room but I have learned that it's harmless. Don't get me wrong, dark entities can be experienced as I have experienced them. I feel a sense of calm after the meditation and she lets herself be known. But the presence is calming and I really can't say that I miss having a flesh and blood woman as I am sure that such a woman would not be willing to stand the hyper-vigilance, flashbacks and nightmares that come with PTSD nor my unwillingness to trust anymore. So I keep my small circle of friends, sexual spirit and Freya close by instead.

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