"Congratulations Mr. Ritalin, you've won 10 million dollars from Publishers House Clearance!"

"Congratulations?", I say aloud into the ether as I pause and ponder the dramatic change in life style that could be unfolding before me.

My thoughts stream off in a thousand splinters, several directions establish priority and over power the noise storm in my mind.

I'm able to focus.

First off - it's Publishers Clearance House, not Publishers House Clearance. That can not be good.

Next I drag up the questions. They always show up at your door, don't they? Prize wagon or something like that?

My phone indicates that the area code is from the West Indies. I confirm it; yes it's Jamaican. The man on the other end of the line telling me about my good fortune has a heavy Caribbean accent.

He's gotten round to the part where I'm only going to get my ten million dollars if I send him $299.00 by Western Union to an office in Kingston Jamaica.

I'm not angry at all at this poor criminal. He must be terribly desperate for the money to engage in such a foolish enterprise. I don't know what burdens he carries, what debt or to whom he owes it. What or how many children are dependent for shoes and supper upon his connivance.

I'm never angry at specters.

I feel no sense that I've lost any thing. I never had this phantom ten million dollars to begin with. A quick check of the Publishers Clearance House website confirms that they never contact by phone and if some one claims it's them, well friend it's a scam.

I think what I could do with that sort of money and when I'm considering the options I realize I don't have a clue. I'd get a new set of wheels maybe, enjoy a nice dinner in a real restaurant, and of course we'd go shopping in New york and Philly for some decent shoes, but what else do I want?

I get nervous about the future once in a while. The news we receive isn't encouraging. It feeds those nagging doubts about not having enough when we're too old to earn anymore, but from what I've seen old people don't spend much. They get all jazzed up if there's a two for one sale at the local shopping center. Spin like tops for the early bird special down at the diner. Flip cart-wheelies over the 20% seniors discount at the pharmacy-center. The last seniors I was related too couldn't wait till Wheel of Fortune came on. Come to think of it they were closer to Vanna White than they were to me!

I'm happy right now. I'll still buy lottery tickets and if we win I'll take the money, but this pie and the sky stuff?

Pffffft!

I told the gentleman that I wanted him to have the money and to spend it as he saw fit. All ten million.

We're doing just fine before the call and we'll be okay after I hang up.

Have a great evening and enjoy that money son, with my blessings for you to have a long and prosperous life.

What more could anyone ask for?