Spring is on it's way! You would hardly believe it, with the amount of snow we still have and continue to receive but change is stirring in the land. I feel it coming. It always brings George Harrison's song "Here Comes the Sun" to mind. That song and musician saved my life many years ago. I hope I do him honor by using it as my official song of Spring.
Trouble sleeping last night. So much pain and tension in my back and shoulders...I did what I could to relieve it, but I still had trouble sleeping, kept waking up throughout the night as well. I'm tired, my sinuses decided today would be a good day to drain and I work in an hour. Thankfully I have the calendar to remind me of my goal, and it helps keep me going. And I think I have to resign myself to the fact that the patch of dry skin on my face will remain until winter is over. No matter how much moisturizer I use, no matter how much lotion and moisturizing products...it remains. Nothing I do or use seems to make it vanish. I'm close to giving up. I hate my fussy skin. Everything dries it out. Everything makes it itch. I own and use more skin and beauty products than a Hollywood princess and yet my skin never seems better. Things that I've researched, compared prices and done a lot of work to pick out never resolve the problem. If I had money, I'd see a dermatologist, but I can't afford it.
I dreampt about my ex-girl friend last night. The previous dream about her involved me holding her while she broke down into tears and cried about how hard the army is on her. We were on a bus. I held her and listened kindly. Then she pulled away and begged me not to come to Texas. I shook my head, told her sorry but I'm coming, and that if she has a problem with it, then she'll have to deal with it. She cried and begged, but I simply moved into another seat and left her to deal with her problems on her own. Last night I was in a dining hall at the school and she came over with friends. She sat down and apologized for everything. I told her I was willing to be friends and that I missed her. I got the feeling she wanted us to be back together, and I sort of wanted it too, but decided we would only be friends, not second chances in a relationship. And I was really happy we were friends again, but worried she'd take it the wrong way and think I want to be back with her.
The rest of my dreams were simply silly! And Star Wars related. I feel like a traitor: I SHOULD be having Star Trek related dreams!! NOT Star Wars! *giggles*
Damn. I'm still groggy...I'm gonna get to work and fall asleep on my feet. LOL. Anyway. My ex-girl friend wants me to behave like we'd never met, so I'm going to be practicing that until I get down to Texas. Its a big campus, but we'll end up seeing each other sometimes. It's inevitable. I want to be practiced so I don't betray anything. After all, if it DID get around that we'd been together she would get kicked out of the ROTC program. So its not just because it was a harsh break-up, but also to protect her military career. In all honesty, I don't think she's going to make it anyway. She doesn't take good care of her body, and eventually the army will be tired of paying her medical bills and discharge her. That's how it works.
Hmm. I wonder who I'm working with today...*sighs* Time to get ready. I'm getting tired of my uniform.