The best way I know of to deal with someone who is being too bossy is to use humor. Instead of acting defensive, and instead of getting your feelings hurt (because it's not about you - everyone who has lived more than five years has felt insulted by a control freak at one time or another), you can break up the controller's momentum by asking exaggerating questions like:
1. Did God (or Goddess) die? Cuz last time I checked He/She was in charge. Not you.
2. Really? You want to boss me around too? Well, get in line with the rest of the ugly demons!
3. Don't feel bad. Most people who feel completely out-of-control get all bossy-ass, just like YOU! Here's the emergency number for a therapist. Call it!
Short of having a quick comeback, you can always make like my Pug and turn your back on the person. Don't engage at all and just WALK AWAY. Bossy people are behaving the way they do because they are unhappy in the moment. Don't let them put their emotional garbage on your dinner plate. You deserve better.