Today is an important day. I remember vividly where I was when I learned about the attacks. That one day has shadowed my ten year career. I find myself realizing how much I have been changed by my service and how much I miss it. I am learning that I face a difficult road to find who I am, now that I am no longer a soldier.
I try to explain why I do some of the things I do, or even why I cannot sleep at night, and I am stuck, unable to explain it. At times, I smile and chuckle, thinking about some of the things I experienced while serving and while deployed. When I tell my stories, I see blank stares, as if I'm insane. For those friends who catch some of the humor, they miss the bulk of it, and I get a bit sad.
I may be mad as a hatter, but I miss being deployed. I miss that structure and the closeness of my friends. To those of us who remain, Thank you for your service. To those who have passed on, I miss you and you will never be forgotten.