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I had been happy easter 2009 i got a non paid job helpping out on the chat section of a web site just making sure chat kept moving and that there was no problems. Time went on and the owners of the site desided to close their site due to not getting on and open their own. Fare enough as we all know we all have to move on at some point.

Then a small group of members started their own site and asked me to join them doing the same job so i did tho it was more involved there as it was helping members with any issues they had and giving advice as and when i was asked for it and directing them to chatrooms when they held lessons.

Soon came the time of the first banning and as normal they were peeved so was the following ones but some bannings were hard due to them being my friends tho i never aurgued with the reasons i knew some was not reaily fair bannings but being in a postion where i could of been banned i kept my mouth shut. then another of my friends was banned she was told she was voted to be banned by the whole team of which she was a member of and was very distressed by the experience she tried to contact all the members of the team but due to being told we were not to talk to the banned only the site managers would corrospond with them i ignored the messages i said to the site manager they had tried to contact me and that i had ignored it.

I had a parcel for one of the site managers (only crystals) but i never knew their surname so i checked on the electro role and had hell of a shock to find the site manager had not even told us the truth on their name , i went round in a daze i never said anything to any one even when i was asked by a member if i was alrite they said i could talk to them but i never did because it was not my place to say though i desided i would wait to send the crystals after i had chance to speak to the manager.

A fortnite or so had gone by i went in to the site to find my inbox flooded with messages i was the next to go i had been accused of giving private information out to banned members and the message went on to say i was a joke and to get out of their faces. It was like i was something on the bottom of thier shoes, I was hurt shocked and confused by the way they were speaking to me.

They never even gave me chance to defend myself they were surposed to be my friends that i had known for nearily 9 months some of them even longer. So i did the normal thing and left as they had showed me i was not trusted and not wanted that they were not intrested in my friendship.

Im not telling this story for sympathy im telling it so others wont be used and hurt like i was by those i thought and alway assumed were my friends. People are not always what they seem and some have dark sides that only show when they have no need for a person anymore. Please remember not everyone is who they say they are and because they can hide behind a pc screan does not always make them nice people just be aware there are some out their who dont care who they hurt.

Now i dont trust people easy and find it hard to talk on chat sites as i feel stupid and also the fact i dont wont to be hurt any more. The confidence i had gained by working on chat has gone and i feel more alone then ever.

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Comment by SorchaMyst on April 28, 2010 at 7:23am
Hugs - If I knew the full storty as to that that was what had happened on there, I would've done something about it and left myself then and there. I do feel partly to blame because the ones who were banned, I'd done it under the courtsey of the others, you know what I mean. Blinded by the truth I guess. But due to them making the decision for me which was a punch to the gut, I can relate. Sometimes when friends or ratehr ex - friends disappear from your life, it's for a reason. Like you're clearing away the old negativity, making room for the new. If you hadn't gotten back in touch with me when you did, I would still be in the dark on that score most probably. I am still currently in a distrust situation myself since being on there, please don't worry, it's the risk you take when you become closer to people. Trust your instincts. If it don't sit right then it's likely that it won't be. If it does, then it is. You realise that they'd had been communicating and checking on my energy as well, afterwards, so a good method is to sing incy wincy spider and picture it weaving a golden thread in your mind if ever you sense that anyone is reading your energy without permission. They also sent an elemental energy my way so I had to clear that out as well.

I never usually talk to anyone from the past unless they contact me first, which to be honest I am truly glad that you contacted me yesterday.

It was good to hear from you. And, honestly, you are dead on in the fact that everyone is not who they say they are, that it's only a matter of time before their true colours show through and they take that mask off.

Another to add - you aren't alone. There are people out there too who have been in the same boat as you. I know the feeling of the alone very well indeed and tend to keep myself distanced now from a lot of people or users online. For the same reason mainly. But what you may wish to remember is whatever and whoever tries to drag you down only makes you stronger. Sometimes you let the bad in with the good, and it makes you all the more wiser.
I am going to also ask St Germain to wrap his flame of universal love around you and wish I'd done it sooner.

Peace, blessings be with you
Sorcha

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