PaganSpace.net The Social Network for the Occult Community

All Beliefs are Welcome Here!

Today I heard my soon to be ex-husband on the phone to my oldest daughter. He had went outside to call her in secrecy. And he was telling her I was so mean. I know I'm not a mean person. But then he said "she preaches all this law of three stuff, and then she's a mean person". as the day wore on he became sadder and sadder. Finally crying. He said I had hurt him because he still loves me and I'm not in love with him. Anyway, my question is, no matter if he is right or wrong. How can I as a wiccan cause so much pain, and still think I am doing the right thing? Any answers, my friends?

Views: 74

Comment by Raindust on July 6, 2011 at 9:37pm

I'm not Wiccan, but I do understand the philosophies behind the religion. From that, I have some things to say. In the old days, when a bone was broken and healed crookedly, what would a doctor do? He would break it and re-set it, so it would heal straight. When an arm turns gangrenous, it is removed. A child learns that touching fire is bad by extending their hand and feeling the heat. All of these things apply to this concept: Pain is not always a bad thing. Pain can mean correction, healing, living, discovery, learning. In this, we have to ask: Would it cause more harm to NOT leave? We're supposed to be wise people. I think it would be wise to consider what pain, in this instance, can do to benefit a person. If that person endures this pain, then they become better for it. Not just for the sake of having endured pain, but because the situation is healthier.

 

Just a thought.

Comment by Ada on July 6, 2011 at 10:47pm
We as parents would allow even a small child to have a surgery (all surgery is painful on some level) to correct a deformity. The pain would result in something more beautiful, functional and useful. You need to ask yourself if this change could be the same.
Comment by Priapus on July 6, 2011 at 10:49pm
I don't know...but you've portrayed him as super controlling.  And such people see any refusal to let them control them as extremely egregious...this is common with borderline personalities...
Comment by Priapus on July 6, 2011 at 11:18pm

Right...there is no need to assign blame.  If two can't get along, then move apart...There's a world of good out there...

Comment by Priapus on July 7, 2011 at 3:19am
Hope you're well, Mowitch.  There is a world of good out there...keep moving towards the light...
Comment by Freefire Cauldron on July 7, 2011 at 8:50am
Thank you, my dear friends. We are going to try to get the divorce papers drawn up today. So as Rain said. I am moving towards the light. Brightest Blessings, Mowitch
Comment by CrystalLotus on July 7, 2011 at 5:37pm
Hi.  As a Wiccan, you must be true to yourself.  You owe your soon-to-be ex your heartfelt and gentle honesty.  However, you cannot be expected to stay in a relationship that you truly know is wrong for you.  You aren't causing him pain.  He is in pain because your truth doesn't match his truth.  Be as kind to him as you can, thank him for giving you a gorgeous daughter, and try to allow him space for his pain.  He will heal, I promise.
Comment by Priapus on July 7, 2011 at 10:56pm
Exactly.  I think CrystalLotus has it.  If you can't live together, you gotta live apart.  That's a CW lyric...John Anderson I think?
Comment by Priapus on July 7, 2011 at 11:00pm

When It Comes to You

John Anderson

 

If we can't get along,
we aught to be apart,
and I'm wondering where'd you
get that cold cold heart.

Set me free.
Sign my release.
I'm tired of being a
villian of the peace.

You've been giving me bad times,
Tell me what'd I do.
How come I always get a hard time,
Honey, when it comes to you.
Saying things that you didn't have to.
How come I always get a hard time,
Honey when it comes to you.

You only get one life,
and this I know.
I want to get my licks
in now before I go.

Fire of love.
is dead and cold.
I got to satisfy
the hunger in my soul.

You been giving me bad times.
Tell me what'd I do.
How come I always get a hard time,
Honey when it comes to you.
Saying things that you didn't have to.

If we can't get along.
we aught to be a part,
and I'm wondering where'd you
get that cold cold heart.

Set me free.
Sign my release.
I'm tired of being a
villian of the peace.

You been giving me bad times.
Tell me what'd I do.
How come I always get a hard time,
Honey when it comes to you
Saying things that you didn't have to.
How come I always get a hard time,
Honey when it comes to you.
How come I always get a hard time,
Honey when it comes to you.

Comment by Freefire Cauldron on July 8, 2011 at 6:53am
Rain, Thank you so much for always being such a good friend. And Crystal Lotus, dear girl, I hope you are right. Last night I could hear my husband crying from what used to be our bedroom, all night long. I leave for the shelter in a few hours. Today will either be one of the best days of our lives because of a new happier beginning, or it will be one of the worst, because of the pain we are all suffering. I did find out there is a library in the town I am going to. So as soon as I can get settled and find out what the system is I will be back in touch. Brightest Blessings, Mowitch

Comment

You need to be a member of PaganSpace.net The Social Network for the Occult Community to add comments!

Join PaganSpace.net The Social Network for the Occult Community

© 2019 PaganSpace.net       Powered by

Badges | Privacy Policy  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service