Pagan Parents...

MM everyone!!! I am curious to know how many of you raise your children treading the path. If not, what age do you think is a good age to introduce them?? Do you have an inner conflict when it comes to this?? How many of you have decided to let them grow up and decide for themselves?? Do you teach every aspect of Paganism?? Do you let them join in ritual or just celebration?? Tell me everything. Been mulling over these questions for some time now........time to ask for help.

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Permalink Reply by Elven Path on June 5, 2008 at 2:35pm: I didn't see this the first time - you may have it solved already but my first inclination is that something emotionally affecting the child is going on. You can use Rescue Remedy, or if it is long-term, to find a flower essence that "tests" on the child to allow them to release this emotional programming. If possible, try to remove the emotionally upsetting conditions, if known. Also, on an aromatherapy level, I mixed several drops of cypress oil with some olive oil and had my son rub it on his tummy every night before bed to stop wetting, and it worked really well - when the oil was gone, he was afraid he might need it still, so I told him let's see if everything works now, and if not I will make some more - but he was fine! :-); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Shannon on June 20, 2008 at 10:43pm: yeah, patience. that is unfortunately the only way. My son potty trained easily.....at the age of 5. Sometimes it takes letting them decide they are ready.

Cloth diapers, and training pants work to encourage the readiness too.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Elven Path on June 4, 2008 at 6:25pm: I found the craft after having children (and after my separation from their father). I discovered astrology first and other things came in after that like a floodgate! I had been solitary for many years and showed my kids everything, but I also let them know that not everyone would understand what we do (and in fact very few understand). Kids are so much smarter than we give them credit for!

My son never got into situations that he exposed this part of himself with others unless he knew they were open. When visiting Ground Zero in Spring 2002, he inadvertently empathed extreme pain in his hips while the bus was driving by, then when it left, the pain left. He didn't tell anyone about it until he came home to tell me so I could help him sort it out - and we figured he picked up energy of one of the souls that died in the collapsing building or that jumped out - and in any event sustained great hip injuries before their death.

My daughter on the other hand had a visitor whom she didn't know at the time was NOT open in any way, and in fact told her that I was going to hell because I read tarot cards. She tried to place her on the spot to reveal herself, and my daughter expertly dodged the question. Later, it turns out that though this girl was raised fundy Christian, she smoked pot with her parents! She also thought it was OK to steal and proceeded to steal many pairs of new earrings from my daughter. When this was discovered, she and I were figuring out a "spell" to get the earrings back or to have justice done, and we didn't even have time to do it - the next morning, another friend helped her retrieve the earrings from the guilty girl's locker, after she denied knowing of their existence. Because she was angry my daughter "won" by recovering her stolen property, she then decided to tell everyone in school she was a witch - keep in mind this is fundy little mountain town, not the place to broadcast this at all. When the kids at school confronted my daughter, she decided to turn the tables - she made a joke out of the whole thing, saying "Sure, wanna see my broom in my locker?" and making all the kids laugh, and then telling her they thought the other girl was just horrible anyway, and that they liked my daughter just fine! Again, kids are smarter than we think (and needless to say this girl has not been on our property since hehehe)!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Lion Spider on June 5, 2008 at 10:40am: We have not strictly taught ours. My 7yo is ready to start but it is hard for her to understand so it's very basics for her. The eldest who recently turned 11 is at the stage of not really listening so it is hard to teach/guide.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Andriel on June 8, 2008 at 11:09pm: What a good question and one that has a different answer for everyone. I was very open with my children about my path, however my husband who was very against witchcraft made it well known that he did not want the kids having anything to do with my path. I was also very open with my children about my mother's religion, and my father's. My daughter is a Christian who is very accepting of all religions and my son is a pagan. I have my niece for the summer to in a way foster her and help her begin to explore the pagan path. I have always believed if the child is old enough to ask the question they are old enough to get an answer. this doesn't mean that I always go into each and every detail but I would rather give them a basis to start from instead of ignoring them and they seek answers from someone who doesn't know what they are talking about.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Sarenth on June 20, 2008 at 1:42am: "What age do you think is a good age to introduce them?"

I have been teaching my son about the Goddesses, Gods and Spirits from the womb. I've prayed over him in the womb, and welcomed him into the world alongside my teacher and his mother with the words of the God and the Goddess as we work with them. So, they are already introduced!

I think that giving him the tools, the solid ground of faith that I believe can be had of Paganism not only is healthy, but gives him a point of reference from which to view other religions, much in the same way that I was able to try to even approach different mindsets from my Catholic background. The religion that you teach can give your child faith in the world and themselves when they need it most and lack it deepest, and can empower them to greater acts of honor than the generation before them. It is all about what and how you teach.

I have had my son in ritual, to introduce him to the Gods, but I'm still trying to work out a kid-friendly ritual format for him since he is now a toddler.

Perhaps some kid-specific tools, ones that will not break or hurt them if they wing it around some. My thought is, perhaps a toy made of a soft wood, like child's blocks. You could incorporate the child's blocks into a ritual, like a green mountain that your child can put on the altar (it could be a coffee table par the moment till they get taller) in the North. As another idea, perhaps you could get a bag of plastic animals you can find at any toy store and let them pop one out of the bag and interact with the spirit (with you mediating, of course!) and see if they have a new playmate, or guide. Another idea that comes to my mind, is that it could be them helping start to finish, writing a ritual geared toward them if they are interested.

Just some thoughts.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Shannon on June 20, 2008 at 10:46pm: My son knows as much as I do.....I explain everything he askes, whether I am ready to explain or not (sexuality comes to mind, he's 5!); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Saffire on June 20, 2008 at 10:51pm: I have an 11yo and a 5 yo. I'm raising them the way I was raised... kinda.

I was raised an 'open minded free thinker'. Long story short, my mom was shunned from her uber-Christian family and we were allowed all freedom to find our own way, spiritually. I found it WAY too much for a kid to ponder everything with little to no guidance. I'd go to churches when I slept over at a friend's house on a Saturday night but I never saw it as anything more than boring, full of stories, pomp and circumstance (in my kid opinion). I'd had a natural draw to Paganism and was relieved to find the "good stuff" at the library early on and devoured what I could.

For my own kids, I'm raising them with full awareness that I'm a witch and a Pagan and what that means. They also have an understanding that others think differently and every religion out there has it's own take on life, the universe and everything. They accompany us to rituals and gatherings, though they have a choice as to participation. Nothing is forced on them, spiritually speaking and frankly, I think because so much as at their disposal, they don't have the same NEED I did as a child to devour my studies... they feel, take for granted, assume it'll always be there so feel no need to rush in making a choice or a decision as to their spiritual path.

I'm fine with that. My goal is to raise independently, free thinking people who can make up their own minds. If they choose a Pagan path, so be it... regardless it will be THEIR'S, not mine... even if it's labeled the same. So the free thinking, open mindedness is of my youth, however, I am here for more guidance than my mom was able to give (she, herself needed to heal and find peace with her own spirit and past). If my kids would have an interest in a particular path, religion or whatever, I'm here to help get them good info and explore it - to keep them safe, while they explore and decide for themselves.

My son feels no pressure but when asked by others he'll use the Pagan label... Do I hope that he shows an interest? Sure... but it's his life, his spirit and when the time comes, HE'LL know, just like I did as a kid. Letting our kids choose for themselves can be harrowing but it is their lives. Case in point (though mundane in nature it's still a parenting point)... I worried when he took up the violin... I thought he did so only because I had done it in elementary school. Well, he's blown me out of the water, keeping with it for 4 years now (1 year more than I) and dropping out of chorus to do so (I made the opposite decision at his age). He forged his own path with it... he enjoys the music and the instrument... it's HIS choice and I no longer worry that he feels pressure to continue - even though I ask him every year "are you sure?" before I send in the lease payment. LOL

Follow your gut... answer their questions truthfully... brace yourself for nosy friends to ask questions when they start school (it happened with DS - was NOT expecting an inquisition from 3rd graders!)... embrace them for whatever path (or non-path) they end up choosing... guide, protect and learn with your child. We have as much to learn from the, as they from us...; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by M. R. Sellars on June 20, 2008 at 10:55pm: We're letting ours decide for herself when she gets old enough to understand. IMHO, insisting a child follow a particular spiritual path before they can even understand what spirituality is in the first place doesn't accomplish anything.

But, how to raise a child is a choice left up to the individual parents.

Since ours ends up on the road with me at times she attends quite a few pagan festivals. So, we answer her questions and assure her that she needn't obsess over a spiritual path at this point in her life. She doesn't have to be Pagan, Christian, or anything like that. She just needs to be a kid.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Alicia on June 22, 2008 at 11:28pm: My dad loves to tell a story about me standing in the window, dancing under the moon light when I was about 5 or so. I was fasinated with it as a child and it has only grown stronger as I get older. My son also loves to dance in the moon light (5 yrs) and while I don't take him open rituals we do celebrate in our own way at home. I don't have any problems telling him about nature and the things I believe in. That just seems to come natural. What I have trouble with is explaining the other side of the coin. Why I don't believe in he xtion god and such.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Corrie Palmer on June 23, 2008 at 12:24am: Im not a Pagan parent but I come from one. My mom let me decide and she also incouraged me to try other religions first. When I finally decided that Paganism was my calling she helped me get into it.

My advice would be to let your children experiance everything they can but also introduce them to Paganism. Let them decide.

Hope I helped :)

~Corrie; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Asira on June 26, 2008 at 3:30pm: My son is almost 3 so he hasn't been in an circles or rituals. I do take him to festivals though. He will be participating when he's old enough to stay still and concentrate on what's going on...so I'd say 10ish? Not sure what age that is :D; ▶ Reply to This