What makes a Fluff-Bunny?
Just in case any of you really wanted to know what makes a fluff-bunny, here is your answer.
The question keeps coming up, "What makes someone fluffy or a fluff-bunny?" The concept of "fluff-bunny" is similar to "twinkie" as used in many American Indian communities: someone who either plays at the spiritual practices or is serious about it but goes for stereotypes and glitz rather than factual information.
Practicing any significant number of these characteristic behaviors will be good and sufficient cause to label you accordingly. These are from actual experience, but they don't all apply to any one person - we hope. Several of them seem contradictory; this doesn't appear to matter to the people in question.
ote: if you find this list offensive, then you are probably a classic fluffy. If you think we're being unnecessarily confrontational with this, you may be right (but see item 7). If you think we're picking on Wiccans, maybe so; but we do know plenty of non-Wiccan fluffies.
1. Claim to be practicing some really old path, but don't put forth the effort to find out what people actually did or believed on that path. Make stuff up while claiming that it's how the ancients did it.
2. Ignore anything dark or threatening, even if pretending to work with dark deities. Talk about how your deity of choice is always good or always right, or pretend your favorite dark goddess is really just a misunderstood sweetie-pie.
3. Accept any kind of nonsense you're told by another fluffy or read in some book with a crescent moon on the spine. Alternatively, accept any one source as definitive, no matter what those tight-assed intellectuals think about it. And do pass on whatever it is you think you know as though you invented it.
4. Get all worked up at any kind of challenge involving logic or fact. Only feelings really matter. Disregard what others have to say if it doesn't affirm what you already believe, whether or not they can prove their claims.
5. Make a big point of being huffy at anyone who doesn't take whatever you say at face value, especially if they continue to present evidence that disproves your claims, and declare that you are finished talking about the subject because "everyone is entitled to an opinion" and so your opinion is just as good as anyone else's.
6. Emphasize loudly that people don't have the right to make judgments about your words if they don't know you very well offline. Regardless of what you actually SAY, only your professed motivations should matter to other people.
7. Avoid conflict at all costs, and jump into other people's disagreements, even if you're not directly involved, to try to get them to agree for agreement's sake. Agree with other people just to smooth things over, or even lecture them on how they should just get along. If you moderate a list or message board, delete any messages that don't agree with you or that present uncomfortable viewpoints.
8. Try to get others to refrain from using profanity or stop talking about a subject because it makes you uncomfortable; for example, go to a clothing-optional event and then pitch a fit if anyone opts to go fully or partially nude.
9. Tell non-fluffies how horrible/non-spiritual they are for not accepting all pagans, regardless of how asinine their behavior might be; but be sure to tell everyone at the drop of a hat that you're Not A Satanist, whether they asked or not.
10. Be sure to complain frequently about persecution, whether you've actually experienced any or not. Extra points if you think someone choosing not to do business with you is "persecution" or if you repeat any form of the "Burning Times" myth:
~ 9 million died (or any number greater than about 40,000)
~ Those condemned as witches were Wiccans (or any kind of Pagan)
~ People were burned at Salem (try hanged and pressed)
You might want to check the Covenant of the Goddess website for a reasonable account of the Witch Hysteria from a source with impeccable Wiccan credentials, except that doing so might be non-fluffy.
11. In conversation in person or otherwise, always assume that the Wiccan Rede (or whatever your code of honor happens to be) applies to all Pagans. If mildly challenged on this, act confused; if strongly challenged, go into Major Evil Eye Mode and accuse the Rede-Infidel (who OBVIOUSLY has no ethics whatsoever) of Satanism, Crowleyism, or worse.
12. Presume to lecture others on any of the Favorite Fluffy Topics:
~ Why Witchcraft is a Religion
~ Only Wiccans are Witches
~ What Real Witches (your definition) don't do: hexes, spells for selfish purposes, animal sacrifices (we're not like those awful Santerians or Voodoo practitioners), sex magick, etc.
~ What Real Witches (your definition) MUST do: be vegetarian/vegan, do charity work, recycle, vote for Democrats, etc.
~ Why Magick should NOT be used to interfere with another's Will or Karma - even by healing them
~ How the world was a happy, peaceful matriarchy until those horrible men had to mess it all up
~ How ritual nudity, sex magick, and the scourge are all in traditional Wicca only because Uncle Gerald was a dirty old man, not because of any actual value they might have
13. Insist that Wicca, or whatever your path is, is whatever you make it, regardless of its history. Demand respect for what you're doing even as you trash the efforts of your precursors and insist on calling the trash by the same name. Don't bother renaming what you do, however loosely based on the original form, because you want to ride on the coattails of people who went before and claim some sort of lineage regardless of the lack of similarities between what they did and what you do.
14. If your belief is "All Goddesses are One Goddess" and "All Gods are One God" and ultimately all deities are aspects of the One, use this as an excuse to not bother learning about or working with specific deities. Or, when you do call on a Lord and Lady by name, mix and match any two from any pantheons at any times.
15. Use a disability as an excuse not to check your facts or learn anything new, or as an excuse to engage in other fluffy behavior. Claim persecution if anyone dares to suggest that using a spell-checker isn't unreasonable even for someone with a disability.
16. Sign your emails/posts "Namaste" or "Bright Blessings" when the content of the message chews someone out, insults, or otherwise contradicts the salutation.
17. You can be lacking in all of the preceding Fluffy Traits, but if you demonstrate this one, you're in the Fluffy Club: Don't show any signs of having been touched by divinity or ecstatic experience. Many mainstream Christians sing hymns as if they were laundry-lists, and everyone accepts them, so that is what we want to do. Look askance at people who actually get out of themselves in ritual or celebration. Care more about what society and/or your friends think than what your deities think or whether you are actually getting anything out of what you do. Be sure not to do anything, even if it would develop your path/abilities/insights, that might possibly provoke disapproval or make you lose face.
It should additionally be noted that this is not a diatribe against people who simply haven't learned much yet about paganism; it's about people who refuse to have integrity in their path or to use logic and critical thinking skills. The grey matter in our skulls isn't just to fill up space; it's a tool that should be used - OFTEN.
The distinction we make between newbie and fluffy is precisely in terms of how they respond to education. We encounter plenty of each kind. The uneducable will more likely flare up at anyone who presents the truth, because they have already committed to "it's anything I want it to be" as a guiding principle, whether we're talking about history, theology, the practice of magick, or whatever.
Why do we make such a big deal about fluffies? We'd happily let it pass if they weren't so busy trying to impose their fluffy values on the rest of the community. The rabid fervor with which they attempt to impose their flippancy on others gives outsiders the impression that we're all stupid, incapable of critical thinking skills, and inconsistent. Quite frankly, we don't appreciate that, and we don't appreciate being told we need to behave in stupid, unthinking, and inconsistent ways. So while you are certainly entitled to believe whatever you wish, you don't have a right to force it on us; but we do have a right to call bullshit when we see it.
http://pagandiversity.com/fluffy.html
The question keeps coming up, "What makes someone fluffy or a fluff-bunny?" The concept of "fluff-bunny" is similar to "twinkie" as used in many American Indian communities: someone who either plays at the spiritual practices or is serious about it but goes for stereotypes and glitz rather than factual information.
Practicing any significant number of these characteristic behaviors will be good and sufficient cause to label you accordingly. These are from actual experience, but they don't all apply to any one person - we hope. Several of them seem contradictory; this doesn't appear to matter to the people in question.
ote: if you find this list offensive, then you are probably a classic fluffy. If you think we're being unnecessarily confrontational with this, you may be right (but see item 7). If you think we're picking on Wiccans, maybe so; but we do know plenty of non-Wiccan fluffies.
1. Claim to be practicing some really old path, but don't put forth the effort to find out what people actually did or believed on that path. Make stuff up while claiming that it's how the ancients did it.
2. Ignore anything dark or threatening, even if pretending to work with dark deities. Talk about how your deity of choice is always good or always right, or pretend your favorite dark goddess is really just a misunderstood sweetie-pie.
3. Accept any kind of nonsense you're told by another fluffy or read in some book with a crescent moon on the spine. Alternatively, accept any one source as definitive, no matter what those tight-assed intellectuals think about it. And do pass on whatever it is you think you know as though you invented it.
4. Get all worked up at any kind of challenge involving logic or fact. Only feelings really matter. Disregard what others have to say if it doesn't affirm what you already believe, whether or not they can prove their claims.
5. Make a big point of being huffy at anyone who doesn't take whatever you say at face value, especially if they continue to present evidence that disproves your claims, and declare that you are finished talking about the subject because "everyone is entitled to an opinion" and so your opinion is just as good as anyone else's.
6. Emphasize loudly that people don't have the right to make judgments about your words if they don't know you very well offline. Regardless of what you actually SAY, only your professed motivations should matter to other people.
7. Avoid conflict at all costs, and jump into other people's disagreements, even if you're not directly involved, to try to get them to agree for agreement's sake. Agree with other people just to smooth things over, or even lecture them on how they should just get along. If you moderate a list or message board, delete any messages that don't agree with you or that present uncomfortable viewpoints.
8. Try to get others to refrain from using profanity or stop talking about a subject because it makes you uncomfortable; for example, go to a clothing-optional event and then pitch a fit if anyone opts to go fully or partially nude.
9. Tell non-fluffies how horrible/non-spiritual they are for not accepting all pagans, regardless of how asinine their behavior might be; but be sure to tell everyone at the drop of a hat that you're Not A Satanist, whether they asked or not.
10. Be sure to complain frequently about persecution, whether you've actually experienced any or not. Extra points if you think someone choosing not to do business with you is "persecution" or if you repeat any form of the "Burning Times" myth:
~ 9 million died (or any number greater than about 40,000)
~ Those condemned as witches were Wiccans (or any kind of Pagan)
~ People were burned at Salem (try hanged and pressed)
You might want to check the Covenant of the Goddess website for a reasonable account of the Witch Hysteria from a source with impeccable Wiccan credentials, except that doing so might be non-fluffy.
11. In conversation in person or otherwise, always assume that the Wiccan Rede (or whatever your code of honor happens to be) applies to all Pagans. If mildly challenged on this, act confused; if strongly challenged, go into Major Evil Eye Mode and accuse the Rede-Infidel (who OBVIOUSLY has no ethics whatsoever) of Satanism, Crowleyism, or worse.
12. Presume to lecture others on any of the Favorite Fluffy Topics:
~ Why Witchcraft is a Religion
~ Only Wiccans are Witches
~ What Real Witches (your definition) don't do: hexes, spells for selfish purposes, animal sacrifices (we're not like those awful Santerians or Voodoo practitioners), sex magick, etc.
~ What Real Witches (your definition) MUST do: be vegetarian/vegan, do charity work, recycle, vote for Democrats, etc.
~ Why Magick should NOT be used to interfere with another's Will or Karma - even by healing them
~ How the world was a happy, peaceful matriarchy until those horrible men had to mess it all up
~ How ritual nudity, sex magick, and the scourge are all in traditional Wicca only because Uncle Gerald was a dirty old man, not because of any actual value they might have
13. Insist that Wicca, or whatever your path is, is whatever you make it, regardless of its history. Demand respect for what you're doing even as you trash the efforts of your precursors and insist on calling the trash by the same name. Don't bother renaming what you do, however loosely based on the original form, because you want to ride on the coattails of people who went before and claim some sort of lineage regardless of the lack of similarities between what they did and what you do.
14. If your belief is "All Goddesses are One Goddess" and "All Gods are One God" and ultimately all deities are aspects of the One, use this as an excuse to not bother learning about or working with specific deities. Or, when you do call on a Lord and Lady by name, mix and match any two from any pantheons at any times.
15. Use a disability as an excuse not to check your facts or learn anything new, or as an excuse to engage in other fluffy behavior. Claim persecution if anyone dares to suggest that using a spell-checker isn't unreasonable even for someone with a disability.
16. Sign your emails/posts "Namaste" or "Bright Blessings" when the content of the message chews someone out, insults, or otherwise contradicts the salutation.
17. You can be lacking in all of the preceding Fluffy Traits, but if you demonstrate this one, you're in the Fluffy Club: Don't show any signs of having been touched by divinity or ecstatic experience. Many mainstream Christians sing hymns as if they were laundry-lists, and everyone accepts them, so that is what we want to do. Look askance at people who actually get out of themselves in ritual or celebration. Care more about what society and/or your friends think than what your deities think or whether you are actually getting anything out of what you do. Be sure not to do anything, even if it would develop your path/abilities/insights, that might possibly provoke disapproval or make you lose face.
It should additionally be noted that this is not a diatribe against people who simply haven't learned much yet about paganism; it's about people who refuse to have integrity in their path or to use logic and critical thinking skills. The grey matter in our skulls isn't just to fill up space; it's a tool that should be used - OFTEN.
The distinction we make between newbie and fluffy is precisely in terms of how they respond to education. We encounter plenty of each kind. The uneducable will more likely flare up at anyone who presents the truth, because they have already committed to "it's anything I want it to be" as a guiding principle, whether we're talking about history, theology, the practice of magick, or whatever.
Why do we make such a big deal about fluffies? We'd happily let it pass if they weren't so busy trying to impose their fluffy values on the rest of the community. The rabid fervor with which they attempt to impose their flippancy on others gives outsiders the impression that we're all stupid, incapable of critical thinking skills, and inconsistent. Quite frankly, we don't appreciate that, and we don't appreciate being told we need to behave in stupid, unthinking, and inconsistent ways. So while you are certainly entitled to believe whatever you wish, you don't have a right to force it on us; but we do have a right to call bullshit when we see it.
http://pagandiversity.com/fluffy.html
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by The Lady Raven on -
Just ask Alice about the White Rabbit. :-)
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Permalink Reply by RaevynKiss on -
LOL, Lady Raven!!! You almost made me pee my pants! (Old inside joke in the family.) :p But I do thank you for the laugh!!! :-)
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Permalink Reply by peace lily on -
That's my ringtone for work, hehe!
P.L.
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Permalink Reply by July EveningStarr on -
Well stated Peace Lily.
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Permalink Reply by Selene on -
I stopped back here for 2 days and finally, with access to my computer, read every word of this discussion. It hardly seems fair of me to drop a comment and leave again tomorrow, but I did want to say this: kudos to you, Peace Lily and SIN, and to all who wonder why we have to label one another and call names. It seems to me that no one here is forced to follow another's path or even to add them as a friend or is required to read anything written by someone they consider not up to their superior intellectual standards. If someone wishes you "brightest blessings" it may be that they sincerely wish you well, and that is their way of saying it. I've had students, albeit young ones, wish me "love, light and lollipops" and while it made me smile, I took no offense. I'd rather have someone say that to me than "f-you and the same to the horse upon whose back you rode to get here!" It seems to me that if you don't like someone's philosophy because it seems "fluffy" to you, well, since when is "fluffy" a bad word? If you are going to name call, then use the correct names: ignorant, unlearned, unwilling to continually reducate one's self; self-aggrandizing, etc. You can figure it all out, hmmmm? Such a small word, "fluffy," to have unleashed such venom.
In teaching the Craft, I'd rather start with a student who thinks I have a big book in my attic and wants a spell from it, than with someone who comes in saying, "I have umpteen cords, know (insert dropped name here) have studied thermodynamics and understand how energy is created and disbursed; so I dare you to teach me anything." I reserve the right to give those "seekers" all the boot.
If I have offended anyone by wishing them "many blessings" then I truly rescind that positive energy which I offered to you, and offer instead this ancient Chinese curse:
"May you live in interesting times."
As I've said before, I have many titles to my name, but the ones I prefer are,
Selene, Hag, Crone, Witch - ah, and the one bestowed upon me by Sabrina the Ink Witch, "High Priestess Fancy Britches."
We (the above) are leaving on a jet plane tomorrow, but I'm sure this thread will be going around again the next time I'm able to pop back in. How sad is that? Has this not all been said already?
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Permalink Reply by RaevynKiss on
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Thank you, Selene! I will watch my wackoid sense of humor now, as I mean no offense to anyone in any of my responses here. (I was born with it and can't seem to do anything about that!) I am intending to make fun of myself with the "Frou-Frou" comment, as I wouldn't ever want to proclaim to one and all that I know everything or have some sort of dibs on knowledge or experience.
I have never called anyone a Fluffy Bunny and, as stated on my profile here at PS, I don't care for that term at all. I find it quite degrading and insulting. It really does mean someone who has absolutely no substance, to me, and I cannot say I've actually encountered a true "fluffy bunny", by this definition, over the years.
I have always offered to help anyone who requests it at my own groups and at others. I am fairly new here, but am also willing to help when and where I can, learning from others as they learn from me via sharing.
I agree that labels can be quite limiting. The ingredients are what's important. I'm just making sure that what passes for my "humor" is not being misunderstood! :)
Blessings )O(
RK
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Permalink Reply by The Lady Raven on
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There is a difference between a philosophy and a label. I go by many labels, some are not very endearing, but it is a label that someone has laid upon me. Am I my labels? No, well maybe some I am. :-). The point is that fluff-bunnies are stout in their philosophies and might as well say it labels. The problem, that I have with a fluff-bunnies philosophy, is that it is generally one way and only one way. Fluff-bunnies misguide many who are starting out in Wicca, Witchcraft, or whatever path a person may choose to walk. Fluff-bunnies are throughout the Pagan community and that means that every walk in the Pagan community is affected. Labels can be peeled off and stuck on a refrigerator, but a philosophy is much harder to "peel" off.
Now if you are a person who likes the color pink, sparkles, and bright shiny things, that does not deem you a fluffy. These are things that a person enjoys. I like all the above mention things, am I a fluffy? Only when I am in the arms of my beloved. *insert throw up noise now.*
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Permalink Reply by Solitary Amazon on -
Would it be fair to say that Fluffy Bunnies will call someone else Fluffy? ;-)
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Permalink Reply by Selene on
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I wasn't referring to you at all, RaevynKiss! In fact, I only wanted to send kudos to SIN and Peace Lily and got a wee bit carried away. But whether you call it "philosophy" (again, not you) or "labeling," name calling is still name calling. If you don't like what I have to say, then ignore me. That was one of the first thing I put on my page when I came to Pagan Space, right after it started. And during those first few weeks, I got myself in a wad of trouble because I mentioned my heritage as part of who I was, and while some people understood from where I was coming, others thought I was being an elitist. Which surprised me since being from two of the most hated groups of humanity, LOL, I certainly wasn't bragging. I thought I was defining myself, but I would now hesitate to do that, because I won't wear a label - or be defined by a philosophy - that isn't mine. You can throw it at me, but it won't stick.
So here's my take on this. The person that is being denigrated here is more of a Pretender than anything fluffy. Info goes in one ear and comes out the other. They float from one philosophy to another, depending upon the "cool" factor of the person nearest them that spouts said philosophy. They don't learn; they repeat factoids. We all know them. I can think of 5 right off hand - not that I'd ever say their names, LOL. Whatever "philosophy" they wear can be taken off like yesterday's t-shirt with a cute comment on it, as soon as a new one comes along. They aren't "fluffy," the are Pretenders, generally ineffectual, usually loudly spouting one thing today and another the next and to anyone with a whit of intelligence, they are obviously not worth the trouble. Even new practitioners, no matter from where they come, can usually spot who is taking a running dive at every new philosophy-of-the-moment and jumping through that hoop like a well-trained dog (apologies to well-trained dogs),and who is logical, rational and stays with their beliefs while being accepting of other members, and learning and growing at the same time.
We have to give the new seekers and the ones among us who want to learn something new a little credit; if you can spot the people whose philosophies are filled with more holes than Swiss cheese, in a week or two, so can they. How do I know this? Because when a young'un comes to Pagan Space, for some reason they feel safe with me, and come to me looking for a teacher. It's because of my advanced age, not my great wisdom. They see 61+ and think, "ah, Granny! Safe to ask questions here." They get smart so fast. It's why I started the "Teachers, Mentors, Guides and Guardians" group (and I thank those of you who enlisted, because you are the backbone of Pagan Space, and its heart and soul), because I knew I couldn't do it all anymore, and because they were already so smart in the ways of the world. They recognized the pretenders immediately. They gave me hope. And I gave them to you all, knowing that yes, they might waste a week or two with the "wrong" person, but that eventually a match would be made. Maybe I'm naive, but I have a lot of faith in every person's ability to tell sh*t from *Shinola. (*that's shoe polish to those who don't polish their shoes, LOL)
We may all spend a little time learning what doesn't make sense, but isn't that a learning experience in itself? If you look at the Pretenders, you'll see that eventually, they walk alone; they just don't know it, LOL.
I meant you no disrespect Lady Raven, but a pretense is a pretense, whatever you call it.
And just because some members don't want "brightest blessings" to be sent to them, let them put that on their pages. You can put pretty much anything you want up there, and if you'd like me to sign off on a comment with "Hail to the dark donkey bum" I just might do that for you.
And now I really do have to finish the laundry....pack a suitcase.....throw out old food.....find my husband.....print out airline tickets yet again.....and weigh my freakin' suitcase on the bathroom scale.....all the mundane things of life.
But it sure felt good to be a part of community again. See ya when I can. And if you ever want to talk about why you feel compelled to hurl in the arms of your beloved, Lady Raven, well, I used to be a mental health therapist before I retired to become a jeweler and the writer of the longest sentences on Pagan Space. My door is always open (walking away, heady with the scent of bleach and detergent.)
Selene
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Permalink Reply by peace lily on
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You're so funny, Selene, I just LOVE YA! I hope that isn't too fluffy of me, LOL
Peace Lily
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Permalink Reply by Selene on
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Big smoochie woochie to youchie, my Dear Friend!
I love you too, as well you know. I came back from the depths of family Hel, LOL, to re-add you as my friend. That was a big "duh" on my part - what was I thinking? On the other hand, my whole page is screwed up, and Starr is doing her best to fix it. I don't even remember deleting you, but I looked when I got home, and - no Peace Lily! But yet your message came through, as Psychedelic Nana! Weirder and weirder.
BTW, my laundry came out all nice and fluffy. (snicker...)
TTYS,
Selene
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