By Steve Provost

When I was in high school, some buddies and I formed a group called the He-Man Woman Haters Club. The name came from one of the old Little Rascals shorts, in which Spanky, Alfalfa and some other boys formed a club by that name because they were fed up with romance.

Our club's name was entirely tongue-in-cheek. We were a bunch of young, single guys who didn't have girlfriends and desperately wanted them. It was our way of sending a raspberry - with the distinct flavor of sour grapes - toward the female population who had the temerity to reject such dashing young eligible bachelors. The point is, we really liked women. We were just bummed out (to use a phrase in vogue at the time) that none of them, at least then, seemed to care much for us.

Flash forward 30 years. I still like women. In fact, one of the things that drew me toward Paganism is the balance it offers between the masculine and feminine. Most Pagans acknowledge both god and goddess, a refreshing change from the all-male triad of Father, Son and Holy Ghost (though some will point out, with some justification, that the third person of said trinity was originally feminine - the dove being an ancient symbol of the goddess Astarte).

The Old Testament seemed to be ruled by a god with more testosterone than he knew what to do with, flying into jealous rages over his "bride," aka Israel, and her flirtations with "other gods." And goddesses. (Did I mention Astarte?) This self-proclaimed jealousy was used to justify genocidal attacks against nearby cities and towns that dared to worship another deity. Men, women, children and even animals were butchered without mercy. I found such stories horrifying, as they seemed based on nothing more than bigotry and ethnocentric egotism: "We are the chosen people!"


Says who? A possessive and somewhat paranoid god who was badly in need of some anger-management classes? Sorry, but I didn't find such a source particularly credible or authoritative. The god of the Old Testament seemed like an abusive husband trying to keep his harried housewife "in her place." If that was the attitude of this god toward his people, it was hardly surprising that his disciples were telling women to put their dreams on hold to serve their husbands, to love, honor and obey because the man is the head of the woman (1 Cor. 11:3). In other words, she's too stupid to think for herself.

I found this brazenly insulting and simply unacceptable.

It was natural, therefore, that I should gravitate toward Paganism. It seemed to balance out all the testosterone-laced tirades of the Old Testament with more nurturing and, at times, fiercely protective attributes often associated with women - and too often discouraged in men. It also seemed to play up more positive, traditionally masculine traits such as confidence, courage and a sense of honor.*

So far, so good.

But imagine my dismay when I found some women within Paganism behaving just as badly as the paranoid patriarchal god I had rejected. The only difference: Instead of directing their venom at women, they were spewing it at men, declaring, "We are the chosen people!" with the same vehemence used by the Judeo-Christian crowd. Rather than acknowledging both god and goddess, masculine and feminine, the trend here was to magnify the latter and degrade the former.


Longtime activist Pagan Z. Budapest traced male aggression to something she called sperm wars: "Men have to realize that they are acting out sperm wars on each other. Sperm attacks each other, and kill each other, only one percent will make the journey to the egg. The rest is wasted. This is acted out by men in other areas of life as well ... "

Excuse me, but that's nothing more than a mouthful of pseudo-scientific bullshit. The last time I looked, every human being was the product of both a sperm and an egg. Not just men, but women as well. Applying Budapest's logic to basic biology, women would be just as likely to engage in "sperm wars" as men. After all, every woman started out as one-half sperm.

Sperm are not men. They're not even animals. They don't form little armies and go around launching attacks on each other like soldiers in a microscopic Battle of the Bulge. The idea that sperm go to war with one another is based on a hypothesis that's been around since the 1970s and has been refuted under scientific scrutiny. 
A 1999 study by researchers at the University of Sheffield (U.K.), found "no evidence for killer sperm or other selective interactions between human spermatozoa." Still, the idea persists because it's a convenient tool to use in bashing men as warlike, barbaric brutes. It's in their nature to behave badly.


What Budapest appears to be doing - probably without realizing it - is merely repackaging the Christian idea of original sin, the concept that we are all guilty of something that happened before we were even born. The difference lies in the fact that, instead of blaming Eve (the archetypal woman), she's blaming  Mr. Sperm (the archetypal man). Both conclusions are equally sexist. And equally wrong.

And we call this progress? Sounds more like the same malarkey coming from a different source, with a different target. Psuedo-science has been used to bolster bigotry before. Nazi attempts to build a "master race" of blond-haired, blue-eyed Aryan supermen come to mind. They're no more acceptable in this context than they were in the Nazi laboratory.

Even more absurd is the assertion made in some quarters that all life is fundamentally female and that that the male Y chromosome is a "broken" or "defective" version of the female X. The She-Woman Man Haters within the Pagan community conclude, based on this, that the X chromosome is superior and that women, therefore, are also superior. News flash: Without men, there wouldn't be any women. The last time I looked, human beings reproduced sexually (stories of virgin births notwithstanding). We're not simply amoebas who divide and conquer. Women need men, and men need women.


It's through sexual reproduction that we arrive at a world as wonderfully diverse as the one we're in. That diversity includes people of different races, sexes, ethnic backgrounds, sexual orientations and so forth. If we truly want to celebrate that diversity, we should affirm the diversity needed to create it - reproductive diversity. Then again, some extremist Pagans don't seem to care much for that diversity in the first place. Budapest, for instance, derides transgender individuals in the following caustic terms: "Women are born, not made by men on operating tables."

Excuse me? I'm going to be blunt here: When the whites-only KKK condemns African-Americans for the color of their skin, how is it any different than a women-only group condemning men for the shape of their chromosomes - or their genitals? And how is that any different from the Augusta National Golf Club refusing to admit women? There's a joke going around online that some Pagans use "tiny axes, just the right size for amputating a penis." Ouch! Yes, it's a joke, but there are those within the community who have reacted to Freud's absurd notion of penis envy by going to the opposite extreme and declaring penis hatred.

I guess we'll have to tear down the Egyptian obelisks and lop off the phalluses on all those ancient statues of Pan and Dionysus in order to conform to this New Pagan Order.

Some of those who target masculinity excuse it by pointing to painful abuse in their own lives. I can understand that. I've been subject, myself, to various forms of verbal and emotional abuse from both men and women.

What's eye-opening about this is to discover that those who have been harmed by bigotry in the past are often so willing to practice it themselves. But bigotry isn't justified by an abusive relationship or social discrimination. Indeed, the opposite should be true: Victims of bigotry should be at the forefront of the fight against it, regardless of its target. To degrade all women - or all men - because some have treated you poorly, is simply taking the Old Testament principle of "an eye for an eye" and applying it to innocent bystanders. By condemning half the human race, you're gouging out millions of eyes, metaphorically speaking, to avenge the loss of just one. That hardly seems fair.


One doesn't hear words such as blasphemy, impiety and sacrilege much in Pagan circles. Still, it's hard for me to think that the Goddess invoked by so many Pagans would be pleased that her name is being used as an excuse for bigotry. Even the virgin goddess Diana, often invoked in criticizing the masculine principle these days, was originally a fertility figure in Roman lore. As such, she helped women conceive and give birth to children - the former being impossible without a male partner. At Lake Nemi in Italy, several ancient sources indicate she was served by a male priest. All this seems to have been lost to some modern Pagans, who focus on her identity as virgin goddess of the hunt while ignoring her other attributes.

Be that as it may, Diana isn't typically referred to as simply "The Goddess." That term is more frequently used to invoke an Earth Mother figure such as Gaia or an archetypal composite figure with aspects of many female deities. She's as much Venus as Diana, as much Aphrodite as Artemis.

Modern devotees of Diana often exclude men from their circles, based on the ancient practice that men were forbidden to enter her temples. But I'm not talking about freedom of association here. If you don't want me in your circle because I've got a penis, fine. Chances are I won't have any burning desire to grace you with my presence anyway. I know that sounds egotistical, but it's far less egotistical than thinking you're somehow better than I am because I had the "misfortune" of being born with a Y chromosome. This isn't about freedom of association at all. It's about respect - respect for individual identity, and respect for diversity. Lack of respect for those things, in my mind, amounts to bigotry.

Are you a misandrist? A misogynist? A homophobe? A racist? It's all the same to me: Each of these terms falls under a single category.

Bigotry.

And if you're a bigot, I reserve the right to exclude you from my circle of friends.

Source:

http://www.theprovocation.net/2011/12/bashing-men-in-name-of-goddes...

Views: 1892

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Hey Steve,

man up, join a random Asatru group, find your inner divine male

and become a dude that gets the hot chicks.


That's the way I desire to look at sexism and lookism as well.

No one can be welcome at every place in this world, which I find somewhat okay even. Male only societies are pretty much embedded in our culture and the ones who are smart create their own groups anyway.

Oh, they probably are. Which pisses me RIGHT off. Believe your bull shit, fine. I can't cure the ignorance of the world. SO you got to ignore then as best you can until they step over a line into what affects others and not just themselves. I'm a frigging HOUSEWIFE, the ultimate stereotype of what women 'should do', and all of this seems stupid to me.

Keri<3

I dunno, Keri.

Our club's name was entirely tongue-in-cheek. We were a bunch of young, single guys who didn't have girlfriends and desperately wanted them. It was our way of sending a raspberry - with the distinct flavor of sour grapes - toward the female population who had the temerity to reject such dashing young eligible bachelors. The point is, we really liked women. We were just bummed out (to use a phrase in vogue at the time) that none of them, at least then, seemed to care much for us.

I dealt a lot with these. They were the ones who were either mean to me because I was none of the pretty girls, or pretended to like me because they wanted to get into the pants of my pretty friend.

I do not owe this type of person any solidarity in their fight against bigotry. I am not an other cheek turner, you know? Z did nothing to me.

Our club's name was entirely tongue-in-cheek. We were a bunch of young, single guys who didn't have girlfriends and desperately wanted them. It was our way of sending a raspberry - with the distinct flavor of sour grapes - toward the female population who had the temerity to reject such dashing young eligible bachelors. The point is, we really liked women. We were just bummed out (to use a phrase in vogue at the time) that none of them, at least then, seemed to care much for us.

I dealt a lot with these. They were the ones who were either mean to me because I was none of the pretty girls, or pretended to like me because they wanted to get into the pants of my pretty friend.

I do not owe this type of person any solidarity in their fight against bigotry. I am not an other cheek turner, you know?


I'll go along with this.  For every guy who desperately wanted a girlfriend but who was ignored by the girls, I tend to believe that these guys were ignored by the girls they WANTED to be their girlfriends.  I daresay there were probably girls around who wanted to be with them, but did not meet their criteria, either in prettiness or in status.

I, too, have little sympathy.

Yes, but on the other hand there were just as many women who had to put up with the same thing from men. It's part of growing up. Everyone fancies someone else and rarely realizes they have awesome people standing right there with them. I don't blame him one but for creating his little 'club'. Hell, I think it's funny. If what you both say IS the case, then that was for THEM to learn on their own.

Keri<3

I can honestly say that I never abused anyone who fancied me or 'ignored' them. I turned down 2 drunk proposals by people who'd have been ashamed of me anyway once sober and made them my mortal enemies.

>.< I do not want to explain this further but I was definitely not a proper target to admiration in any way, and got my share of humiliation by trying to win over guys I fancied with my 'personality'. In retrospective it is fun in a way that produces evil laughter.

No, I do not have any mercy.

If people like to be my associates in a platonic way I am open minded, but I am not going to put myself on the market ever again.

Just because you were treated badly does not mean all women were. I understand having to put up with that bull shit, and that affects your life and how you deal with others. But this person is talking of an observance of many people. Just as many women who were treated as you were created these same little 'clubs' or groups. I see no problem with either so long as they weren't carrying out violence towards others. It is just a way for people to learn a different way of socialization. Hardly sexist, so long as they learn their lesson and don't let their hurt feelings fester.

Keri<3

You are underestimating my reasoning. The main result is that I do not believe in the general consensus of beauty, attractivity and inner and outer values - it is equally shitty for both genders with a considerable advantage for males, which is to be explained in the biologist chapter (women lose the ability to procreate earlier than males).
Today I am THANKFUL for the insight about how people really operate.


But this person is talking of an observance of many people.

I think he is all whiny about a tiny, INFAMOUS minority he sought out all by himself. And the injustice:  I felt like being called in the middle of the night by a rich person who can't decide which car to ride to the country club.

Actually my accusations regarding sexism go to other women to 50% AT LEAST.

If others experience the healing shock of being rejected because of their genetics, I can only welcome them to the world. Learn your lessons.

it is equally shitty for both genders with a considerable advantage for males

I agree. With this statement, but not so much the biological idea of it. While men can reproduce later in life, it is only because they don't have to do much but 'plant the seed' and walk away. A 90 year old woman wouldn't have the strength to carry around a baby. I do think this does affect the idea of beauty. For a long time older women were no longer attractive. Why would they be? The older men were still considered beautiful and went after young women. The base of this chasing is obviously the human urge to keep up with procreation. But this is changing, and very quickly (at least in western cultures). You are finding more and women are 'cougaring', where women are no longer relegated to just the 'old matriarch'. It is about sex and beauty too.

I think I got a little off topic, lol.

Yes, he is bitching. And he IS talking about a minority. But I don't see it as a minority in the neopagan world. Dianic Wicca is, yes, as Z Budepast is surely the most infamous of them all. And I could care less that these women exclude men. Don't like it? Make your own damn group. But there is the idea with the whole 'Goddess' movement that women are the rulers here. It is a majority opinion that is wrong, when you look at the details. But it still gets lost in all the vagina hype.

Keri<3

If you want to get into the idea of beauty, it is an own topic full of discomfort and "ugly truths". It is the topic that gives me surely a quarter of my infights in here.

Female beauty is based on symmetry and the promise of health and fertility. You are right, anything suggesting infertility and sickness is perceived as unattractive because of what it suggests.

Males have equivalents of course. There is a freaking lot to that topic and you will find perhaps 3 people on here who will be both honest and reflected about it.

But it still gets lost in all the vagina hype.

Yay, private parts talk!

In my opinion the worship of body parts is stupid, and if one needs to make the human body a sacred metaphor compulsively, I think these people have difficulties with developing sincere and honest respect towards the physical world.

As for males it is just my experience that they always want attention, and that they always want to be included, and best be in the center of attention. One of the reasons why I do not consider mating is because seriously, why do men expect me to worship their dick and regard it as a wonder of nature?

I am only left to speculations. I think that we live in a very male centric world, where males are sort of running on the fuel that awe and attention is, while females tend to be trained to be self sufficient or receive the attention through either hard work, or through being undeniably fabulous.

I also often encounter males who think that just because they pay attention to me, I should be all excited about them. All this is stuff that does not directly come from any 'human nature'.

My motivation for the above is because we have had all the phallic symbols mentioned. I assume that males like to identify with the asskicking Cleopatras Needle or a rocket, but it is debateable whether such adulescent identification is of benefit for our society. This is applicable on 'vagina worship'. WTF paganz?

My country is reportedly the most misogynist in the European Union, even worse than Spain, complete with women earning less for the same work, chronic nonchalance towards sexism etc. Not to mention funny laws and not so well hidden obstacles if you want education. Beware if you ever get sick as a woman they give a shit about the female body when it comes to meds, especially psychopharmaka. The 'fathers without rights' lobby is sponsored by the most powerful newspaper of our country while women shelters are shutting down one by one.

We are not on the same page, but you give me a typical example for why I think that men are the spoilt gender. please do not take it personally.

RSS

Latest Activity

Ellie left a comment for Beatty
15 minutes ago
Cyber Nether Xtian posted a status
""God morning Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through a prophetic message when the body of elders laid their hands on you.""
21 minutes ago
Cyber Nether Xtian posted a status
""God morning Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through a prophetic message when the body of elders laid their hands on you.""
22 minutes ago
Cyber Nether Xtian posted a status
""God morning Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through a prophetic message when the body of elders laid their hands on you.""
22 minutes ago
Cyber Nether Xtian posted a status
""God morning Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through a prophetic message when the body of elders laid their hands on you.""
22 minutes ago
Cyber Nether Xtian posted a status
"God morning Do not neglect your gift, which was given you through a prophetic message when the body of elders laid their hands on you."
22 minutes ago
Profile IconCyber Nether Xtian, Lightingale, StarAaradia and 3 more joined PaganSpace.net The Social Network for the Occult Community
39 minutes ago
Aaliawilliam posted a status
56 minutes ago

© 2019 PaganSpace.net       Powered by

Badges | Privacy Policy  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service